la mia decisione è

I'm a bit disappointed again that he is not here.. online.. awh damn, I guess I'm going to stop hoping that we'll be able to talk soon.

I've decided to: STOP

I'm starting to feel sad, seriously.. I want to be able to talk to him..

Then again... may be its just plain forbidden.

This is just great, seriously, the fact that I feel lonely and I'm close to just wanting to

have a... lover right now..

this is just damn great.

I guess this is where I'll be stopping... right this moment, no affections and all..

I just feel pathetic, being able to say goodbye again..

I'm telling you this is just plain great.

I can't even tell you, how much I love you right now... that I always think of you..

That I've always loved and will continue to love you if you'd want me to..

It feels horrible that you don't want me..

its tearing a hole in my chest that you stopped caring for me..

how pathetic.

I'm missing you so bad, could you come pick me up already.

Then again:

I'm stressing out that.

I'm going..

to just let it go...

HO DECISO..

[I have decided]

To let my fate just come, fall into place? I'm going to start waiting for the next person in line, I never knew that girls would just have a hard time waiting for that guy to just come around the corner.

Though I've seen a couple of good looking ones, but wouldn't just dare to show interest. God's been reminding me over and over again to just stick to his plan... [Stick with the agenda and you'll do great]

I've been having bad dreams... and some dreams are just plain seriously not right, I haven't been dreaming right. So I'm guessing that I'm not all that great...

Eventually time will come quickly, and my Christmas wouldn't be that great. =[

I never knew how "chivalric" Carlos is... though he's

just too smart.handsome.clean.neat.

-A Ken Type

[Too Perfect for my eyes]

I'm still eying for an "Edward type"... that will never fail me.

or maybe a Brandon Boyd again?

• maybe your sleeping?
• maybe your no in the mood to go online?
• maybe your spending time out with someone?
• maybe your internet is dead?

Your soul hasn't been reaching out to me, it feels sad..

I don't want to judge or guess, that you've finally let me loose..

current mood: sighing mentally...

good night Lyle Angeli...

Did you know:

When I left for U.S.

you sealed my lips..

and you were the last one to seal it permanently..

I wonder who would unlock it.