The attempted "Last Act"

In life we always find problems, we get sandwiched by different cases and scenarios that we can't handle anymore. When do we "stop" when do we say it's the "end of the line"?

Why pretend that nothing is wrong when all along there is a big glacier below the ice cap. Today was one of the days of my life that I never would though would have happen, it's too sporadic. We never know what will pop out in those chocolate boxes. Why do we keep "hatred" why do insert pain in hurt. Why do we self inflict more if we've already scared ourselves?

Seeing what had happen, I made my boyfriend worry about my condition "emotionally"
-- I'm the type of person who gets too oversensitive that just one bite or even one pitch of hurt or sadness I will easily squeal. I never thought, that my own blood related would inhere such pain in himself and harbor such "negative elements"

Why would he do that?

Did he want enough attention?

What was the real motif?

I feel weak but I am very thankful that he is just fine, even though he lost something it's okey. I feel a great amount of pity, I believe that he doesn't need more suffering and all we would have to do now is "Listen" Listen... listen... understand why it happen and accept it.

Lord God,
I am thankful that he just fine.. enough those filing of whatever I am sick and tired of whose at fault. (can't we just be thankful that he is alive?)

I am thankful Lord, Thank YOU Thank you! Please help him to be come stronger and over come this Great problem.

One hour to go

I will totally not acknowledge anything tomorrow,

It felt like I was just 15 years old. now.. it's just 21, no other choice either you jump or you die, either you go down or suffer if you go up. And my only choice now, is to go forth... forward as how I should put it.

But now, I don't want to think about it because- people puts too much make up on the issue. Rather irritating, okey okey... to not be a sour loser I will "acknowledge it"

Birthday signifies, your day of birth. Should we really celebrate it, I guess we should but if people's aim is just to make fun of you. [err? thank you but no thanks]

yes, I will be 4 years older than him for 3 months again. Then after June its back to three years again, Just because my month of birth falls on an earlier quarter doesnt mean many things...

I feeel like a pumkin right now. I don't need to stop time, I'll just let it pass. nothing to serious to think about, just : Thankful! That I'm still here and kicking, the benefits of being alive, is that we get hurt, get happy, get sad, get to see.

Nonetheless, I don't curse my birthday I'm just appreciative of how I turned out to be after 21 years. Sadly I don't get to be a vampire, but I will find it amusing if I can celebrate my 100th.

[what would I look LIKE? -if a vampire I would worry but if I age? aahh... horror.. SOB]


Thank You Lord for my 21st birthday.

After 10 years, (after almost a month post)

So yes, this is pretty funny because I'm writing after a month. It's been that long since the last post, unbelievable right? I was that preoccupied or maybe just lazy. My birthday is near, and it's pretty dramatic since I'm turning 18+3 huhu!!

My boyfriend and I have been pretty good and and slightly in a bumpy rocks. SOB! It's pretty hard when we always fight and it's just the same story. :-(

I miss being in good terms with him... It's almost the end of the school year again, but my boyfriend will still be having classes. T_T

Stress and exhaustion has been killing my system, my mind wont work properly anymore plus my eyes are getting weak. I think I need to get it checked. :( what's happening to me? plus my eyes twitch every now and then. This is horrible, many things showing up...

I feel so dishearten.

Music: love story by Taylor swift
Mood: (:3

|> <|
(^o^)
(n) (n)