Unfold

I'm currently listening to a song called: Unfold by Marie Digby.

First day of second semester just started and the day was really tiring, the information was quite overwhelming. Too overwhelming to the point that it was actually rotating inside my head, this semester I really want to do well (which means a multiple of the last sem again) and I want to do more and participate in school activities. The briefing for Banquet class was really intimidating, it's fun in away you get to do it with you batch mates. But I sort of have a phobia with having overachievers as my leader, well I know their good but I'm just not the kind of person who is very competitive. Well let's put it in a way that I'm more of an angel who sits in one of those clouds in the sky and watches the war that is going down on the ground. Well yeah I'm that kind of person. Well I may sound bitchy in some of my posts -- But I'm the type of person who'll usually be seen in coffee shops and chat with friends, watch movies and eat outside with the boyfriend, stays at home and bake those yummy dessert the typical dormir femme (laid back). That's why most guy men that I have encountered would usually tell me where were you hiding all this time, then I would hit the back inside my head with a in my house dude? [haha! I'm not being boastful or something I'm just sharing some information love] So going back I like teamwork especially when your leader motivates you to go forward and not necessarily pushes you on the spot. Well I think I could take that but most probably I would like to be more of a person who will be a follower. Well I do have some tricks up in my sleeve, but I still want to gain knowledge and when that time comes, I will instantaneously unfold myself to the world.
And when that time comes, it means I have conquered many battles and I have done every obstacle that has passed by me. I have to go, I'm sort of sleepy and I have to rest my brain. P.S. I'm staying at Mika's place, were going to be roomies. It means I'll be living in Ortigas from monday to saturday. >>Princesse de Etoile<<

Snug

I woke up at 12:50pm awhile ago, when I woke up it was raining and I could not get up that much because of my tummy and I felt my menstruation started. So I slowly got up and went to get some new underwear and went to the lavatory. Well, so their was blood -- my mom called me and told me it was lunch time so after doing my thing at the lavatory I went straight to the dining area. To my shockness: it was almost 1:00pm it was really dark like 8 in the morning. I told my mom, grabe it's 1:00 na pala so she said; kaya nga di na kita sana iintayin kasi himbing ng tulog mo. It was really funny because I didn't wake up at 10 or 11 am, so my mom and I proceeded to eat lunch. After lunch I took a bath because I felt like I had to shower even though the weather was pretty cold and I didn't perspire (I still felt like taking a shower). After showering I dressed up in Pajamas and my mom told me naka pajama ka na, kakagising mo lang so I laughed because she was right I certainly just woke up. So when I went back to my room I opened the T.V. and watch HBO the movie was Meet Joe Black, it was a sad story I finished the movie until it ended. The whole time I was snugging in my uncleaned bed (I left my bed unfixed) when the movie was about to end I was already teary eyed when Joe was about to leave and he told Susan his true identity and when Bill and Joe had to leave. It was such a sad movie, there were some lines that I loved that really made me put into tears. There was also a part when I felt like going to the lavatory but I stopped myself because I wanted to watch that part. Hahah! Well eventually the movie ended and I went to the john, after that I went back to my bed again and purr-ed around like a cat because of my cold cozy bed. And now I'm going to sleep because I want to feel that cold bed and I feel sad because of my boyfriend (no we didn't fight it's just that we haven't been with each other and I'm starting to feel sad and lonely, well he has good reasons why we couldn't meet so it's just me being weird.)

P.S.
Today was suppose to be my orientation for second semester but I didn't feel like going, good thing it rained and I don't feel like seeing my school until class starts. I'm not a rainy person. [I gots the photo in deviantart by xtstephanyx >>Princesse de Etoile<<

Whiner's List

I've slightly grown irritated with this Me being a whiner or being picky or in Filipino pagiging maarte. I totally admit to myself that I am a whiner and I am not easy to be pleased, but take note their is a difference between being choosy and a brat. It's been pushing me too hard already that I am a person who always says this and that, honest to the Almighty God: I am a person who is frank! I really tell a person when I don't like this or that or when I think this is different or something new. Ofcourse I am a human, and their are times when I keep my mouth shut (and I tell you completely shut) and those are the times when I'm already pissed with people who tell me I am being inconsiderate and just me being a brat.

I usually open up things or ideas to a person when I think for him/her could do her good or nice. [yes it's pretty selfish] sometimes being selfish is put in a normal curve for some societies (I guess this society of mine is just pretty much arrogant than I am), so basically it really depends. But my side is, when I'm being maarte/picky/choosy it's only when I think this is not right and I think their is a better option for that. So technically that's the time when people think I'm being too inconsiderate and selfish.
So I came up with this thing on my mind and I will be basically do a list of people who mentioned/ called me , it just comes to a point when I just can't take it --their are some people who call me for the fact that they just think it's plainly abnormal for them and what I recommend just doesn't suit their taste. Warning: the people in my list "I really don't have a grudge on you guys" I just want to know and find out and probably I'd reflect about this action. So starting from today I'm going to list some people who called me once, twice, thrice or more --that I'm maarte/picky/choosy/brat.


P.S.
I think this photo of Stewie really fits my current feeling about this topic. >>Princesse de Etoile<<


disclaimer: I erased the list...

A sad star, I am

I wanted to cry awhile ago because of anger -- my younger brother was being so selfish and inconsiderate. I went to his room and told him I'm going to use his P.C. because our ate was using my laptop. So I asked my brother while he was playing with his PS2; so why is this turned off? So I turned it on and wait for it to start up, so basically I waited and he suddenly say that he was going to sleep and he was like shoo-ing me off and telling me to use our mom's P.C. at the den. And so I told him, it's far and I'm going to be fast and just search for something at the web. HE WAS SUCH an aohole that he insisted me to our mom's P.C. --so when his P.C. finally opened up to window, he told me it wont work because of the stupid dashboard of his was not working at all. So I told him with a tone, fine I'm going out and THANK YOU for letting me use your P.C. and he was like your WELCOME. I was about to burst in cry because of anger, honest to God and to all the reader; I am a very sensitive person, I don't like the fact that I want do a very simple thing and someone just pops out and hinders me from doing it. It's like striping me into tiny bacon bits.. Yes it feels that terrible. ]It wanted me not to talk to my brother and not listen to what he will be telling me[ I know his going to rest, I just wanted to use his P.C. and I wont be noisy and everything. Arrogant men makes a bad husband and I know it.

After getting out of his room, I went back to the girls room and my sister was asking what happend? and I replied to her he is such a brat and selfish. Then I turned on the TV to make me relax and then afterwards my sister said she was done using my laptop. I went online and I was invisible for a minute or so and I waited if my boyfriend had any offline messages for me. but heck none, and I was pretty much disappointed so I go hey to him and he said hunny, I waited for so long. Then I told him how come you didn't text )even though I knew he doesn't have load I still asked him( but I didn't go through with him the issue about I don't care if you don't have load, you should buy [duh?]. It's like if I open up that topic to him he would just say that he doesn't have money and etcetera etcetera. I'm so tired of that crap, if ever I would tell him that. He would just say sorry I'm a worthless boyfriend, and it's my fault. (that's his kind of thing) I know I'm sounding such a b.tch -- I'm tired of hearing those same lines. I swear I never wanted to confront him with something, his like a girl who is like when you tell him something and he would cry because it's too damn true. I sometimes get fed up with what's he's been telling me. (the reasons, I mean).. it's like an old jukebox playing the same old track all over again. I mean: I can't stop time and wait for him to totally grow up and be in a same state of mind like mine. I am having a hard time slowing down for him, and he is probably having a hard time catching up with me.

Going back to the chat: after I replied -whatever and you don't have to explain he then said "okey, I thought it would be a good night" then he left like a girl and walked out. What pisses me is it's like hello? ugh. woh? )the feeling: making me look stupid( In a way I didn't want to leave an offline saying his an asshole for leaving me and his such a cry baby and all that jazz. Plus I didn't send him a text message nor call him, I am so sick of like calling him and asking him what the hell you freaking left me and etc etc. That S.O.S [Small old shit] is driving me nuts and I am so tired, and plus I was not in the mood to compromise and withdraw what I said. Probably mr.knight in shining armor is probably too sensitive that he's competing with my sensitivity. I told him before that I didn't want an über sensitive b-o-y.friend --it's so driving me insane thinking about this all over again. You know, I don't really know if his changing. He would always tell me: NEXT time I'm going to change... it's like how many next times already. I am not a b.tch I am just too old for this S.O.S and my feelings, my gut, my heart is screaming out loud What's happening to me?

P.S.
I don't need a cry baby, I need a companion in life who can fully support me when I am in the pits and who could spontaneously and continuously make me happy. Yes I am a princess, all girls should be treated like a Princess. Torturing the heart is not healthy. And yes, I know we are all humans and we commit mistakes but it doesn't necessarily mean all the time.

Warning: This blog is not intended to put a hatred on my boyfriend, I just wanted to let my head speak for itself. Yes having a boyfriend is not always happy, it's a formula of happiness and sadness= a good relationship.
>>Princesse de Etoile<<

Meeting Someone Better

When I was in high school I thought I would meet the prince charming of my life and he would be the: sweetest, kindest and most caring person who could "care" for me. The simpleton cliche(s) a woman would want for his typical "man". But nevertheless we never expected that it's simply different and how come that prince charming never arrived in my life, but a knight actually appeared. There other women who actually did not even meet their prince charming, but instead they met prince charming's best friend, and who is actually THE best friend of prince charming. Basically the slightly downgraded prince --but a knight in shining armor person. Okey, so you thought the prince charming and the knight in shining armor was the SAME? Not at all ladidoos.

So okey, picture this with me: P.C. and K.I.S.A are like your typical boys nowadays, those boys you see in your university; you see the cutest guy in the campus and the cutest guy has his buddies/bros of him? right? so yeah, K.I.S.A is actually one of those bros. BUT: the catch is, you'll never know who K.I.S.A is at all.

Okey ladies, this is the time when you should sigh (haay) it's actually funny, we all know we don't live in a fantasy world with all those princesses and fairies granting your wishes and having that ugly and evil step-mother. But remember remember, we women should not be disheartened, if our relationship is going to the pits or we saw our boyfriend kissing another cheerleader, or an evil wanna be snatches your boyfriend from you. Always remember: things happen for a reason, and those reasons can be valid for you or sometimes you simply can't understand why it happen.

That's why we should live our life naturally and when something pulls us down, we should never see it as something bitter and tragic. We should look at it as something God's gift for us, he loves us so much he went all the trouble for you to take your time on this new problem.

it's never: being a hypocrite it's accepting grace from above and how you give your gratitude to Him.

P.S. I did find my knight in shining armor and his still with me and MINE.

One good friend of mine said, life is a roller coaster -- and yes it has it's ups and downs. This post is a tribute to my friend, Love you artsygirl! courrier c'est fin. >>Princesse de étoile<<

Half way

So basically, I was looking at my 3 star point origami, and I still have 11 more star point to go . I'm so staggering... well my sister and I did the origami small star, and we get to bond like the olden days... and YES! The olden days, my sister has been pretty busy with work and I'm basically resting and slightly indulging the sembreak- still.

yes! basically my before winter break... Technically we don't have snow here in the Pilipinas.. so hmm "yeah, that's my term: before the winter break-ish" but some call it: The Sembreak..vwaha! I'm slightly excited for second semester, another semester for classe française. So yeah.. going back, my sister and I bonded over this small origami star, and she was tasked to do the folding part because she can't do the pinching of the corner part, that's the part when you do the sides... so yeah :| it's like 1:22am and my head is not working properly, I got to look at some awesome pictures of my friends, suddenly I felt sad. Sad in a way that I envy them because they get to show their smiles in photos. Plus: I was thinking. I want a pro-camera. I know I sound weird and "here we go again" like: everybody seems to have those pro-cams nowaday thing. piss that fad. Anyways, so yeah --back when my ate was still in college and I was basically half way in finishing my high school, we used to bond and talk about life and how we felt about our parents' thing [ooh not that thing, like how they tell us, don't do this and that crap] Well yes, my sister and I used to talk about those craps about life, but since she's working and I'm busy with this college life whatever it is. We haven't been talking that much and I usually go home late but, ever since that work thing started for her: she basically goes home late and we don't really see each other that much. Parce que )because( When she gets home I'm asleep or doing some lame school work, sometimes when she gets home late I'm already asleep.

We know life has a price, even though it's not very visible to the eye of the person everything has a price tag on it. That's why we say: c'est la vie.

My head is actually telling me to pick up the bags that just fell a couple of minutes ago so I <> and I'm back. It was not a bag, damn: it was the scrap book my boyfriend gave me last summer, my plan for that scrap book was to collect pictures with him and stick it in that scrap book. It's like: having something and you want to use, but your too busy or your hands wont just let you touch it. Honestly: I feel so underpowered, do I need to watch a Tyra Banks show just to be empowered right now? `nah`

Anyways,I'm feeling sleepy now. I'm going to hit the bed right now. Promise: no more looking and viweing. I just needed to think about this whole half way thing.

a demain.

courrie c'est la fin.

Let's see

So tell me, life has been very frustrating and tired like everybody has been up on their toes. I feel so brain dead right now, thinking of many things.But right now.. I couldn't even put it in words! So basically, I just wrote this post to say.. La La La.

--The starbucks planner just started and I'm so excited. The nouveaux planner c'est belle! vraiment grande!!!

And now I have to go and space out my mind.. void everything!

feeling: Drugged and embrouille

courrier c'est fin.

Something on my mind

A good old friend of mine just visited me a couple of hours ago. Basically it means something right? -a problem? -a "I just wanted to visit you" -a "I miss you my friend". It feels happy when my friends go to me, because it means they trust me. (obviously friends need help from other friends right?) So basically it's really not a bother for me to entertain them, why? (pour quoi?) My duty as a friend is to be a good ear which means: "A good listener". It's pass 12 and I have to sleep because I have to go freaking school.

peace. etre continue

Paradise, please?

When we tell people were happy and contended with our current status and situation, the first thing that they will ask us is "why and really" sometimes it's pretty sarcastic and there are times that it's plainly sincere.

It's funny when I tell my friends I have a boyfriend --I do tease them, why? Since almost my girlfriends does not have any special someone in their life; because they want to do good in school. Yes, it is actually nice, though when you think about it --it's so hypocrite of them to say it. I know I'm mean, but I know them, even though they don't tell it to me directly it's how they feel deep inside. I know I know... It sounds so judgmental of me... but don't get me wrong.

Having a boyfriend is like drinking a cold glass of ice tea while bathing in the sun at the beach. But mind you, their are times that that little butterfly in the stomach feeling flies away.

We tell people that we enjoy being single, but underneath our sentences and in our words; we want to be in that small paradise house enjoying someone's company and wanting to be hold.

être continué

Uno dos tres?...

One way you know when your friend appreciates you...
is when he/she thanks you for something that made their day or you gave or told them something that they really needed to hear or have. When you send them messages and you usual expect from them is a reply, feed back from that certain individual. But then when you expect something and it was far from what you thought, never fret or panic.

Pour quoi? [why?]
One: Parce que [because] may be you don't have to know the reason or maybe take it as something that the person chose not to participate or give something back in return. Two: He/she is not ready to participate or simply do something for you, but it does make them a bad person because you should respect him/her. Three: Plainly because it was something far from what he/she expected from you. What is it? we do not know.

Exemptions:
Not replying or not returning back the favor does mean they do not love you or they simply don't care. Let us always remember that "Everything happens for a reason" Maybe your not happy with what he/she did, but we must always understand the other person's decision. With our day to day life, we are always face with Decisions, sometimes it's a minor decision sometimes it's simply as heavy as a humpback whale [which weighs 35 to 45 tons= weight of 500 people]. As human beings, we are faced to answer several questions. Yes, we should understand an individual's choice; we do not hold their liberty of choosing. That's why "understanding" is one of the most important key to the success of life. Yes, you will receive irrational judgment from irrelevant people that will bombard you with Atom bombs [facilitated by Uranium 235: fission and fusion]. blah blah.
Basically, you have to weigh what ever you will tell them.. You need to find the right answer first before questioning them pour qoui [why?] then if they think your on the right track then they will answer you with a parce que [because?] If people blame you, don't hate them. Ignore them~ at least you did you part.

-- We all know it's h-a-r-d but I will tell you this.

Remeber:
Pessimist says: The glass? it's half empty dude.
Optimistic says: The glass? it's half full dude so cheer up.

Premiere

I feel so weird doing this blog thing again-- I know I'm really not good in words and making or creating a sentence out of it. But I'm not also good in speaking, but I really prefer talking. But since I get to have 2 weeks of break might as well have this silly scribble blackboard or whatever. Ouch~ (I bumped my toe)

Basically, I wanted to write... write and write. I sound so idiotic, I know~ and Bow! Since Life is pretty loose and relax, I wanted my brain to work. Well I practically use my brain in school right? So why not use it now.

Okey okey.... I know I don't make any sense, but honestly I don't want to write this cliche: "I want to speak my mind crap" Well I know everybody or maybe almost everybody who creates a blog puts it in their blog. ugh.



AND... I wanted to practice my vocabulary... since I write so stale and pale and bland...

FIN